How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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