Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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