weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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