he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
