So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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