i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
