So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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