you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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