I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize