No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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