69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
be right there i have to get my cape
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize