Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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