How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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