i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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