Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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