none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Everclear isn't food dammit
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
