Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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