My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
