exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
