you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
