i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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