This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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