big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Houston, we have a blender
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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