There was a lot of him and a little penis
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
