As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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