What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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