she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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