i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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