sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
