okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
