you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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