Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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