let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize