P.S. I can't hear my feet
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
