did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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