OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
