Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
