I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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