She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
