Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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