I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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