I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
He called his prostate his "boner button".
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
