yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
