At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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