Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
