why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
