I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Randomize
