I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
