so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize