Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
